Facing Up to Anger

A week ago, I witnessed a protest in Yorba Linda, California. Church groups, Tea-partiers and the members of some Jewish congregations had been called on to protest the charity fundraising dinner of the Islamic Circle of North America at which two controversial Muslim leaders were speaking. The protesters had gathered to protest both the speakers and the aims of the organization which they see as having a “radical Islamicist agenda.” I will let the reader do their own research to judge the merits of the protest, the organization and its speakers.

http://www.ocregister.com/news/america-288163-fundraiser-wahhaj.html

The protest itself was a mob scene in which the assembled crowd armed with signs and American Flags hurled insults at the Muslim families who were rushing into the hall or rushing out. They were told to “Go home!” and called “Terrorist.” Women in hijab were special targets. All men were addressed as “Ahmed” and one piously Christian adult made it a point to yell at little children that “Mohammed was a pedophile” others in the crowd followed this with “Jesus loves you!” It was bizarre and it was a disgrace.

As the crowd was yelling, I looked around at the faces of those screaming their insults and I was reminded of a teaching of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov.
He taught the following

When a person gives way to anger, it stirs up the great accuser, Esau, or Edom. The accuser in the upper world is the source of a flurry of accusers and enemies who come down and take charge of this angry man. His anger puts his wisdom to flight, and the image of G-d disappears from his face. He no longer has the face of a man. This is why he is in the power of his enemies. Because he has the appearance of a beast they are not afraid of him (Likutei Moharan 57:6).

It is true. What I saw around me were not the faces of human beings but the faces of wild animals. I no longer saw the beautiful reflection of divinity that is the essence of a human being’s soul. That soul had been so defiled by anger, so twisted by blind rage that it was gone.

Strangely seeing that brought me an unusual calm and a strength. My own anger at them retreated, and for a few moments, instead of enraged human beings, I saw cornered frightened snarling animals. Perhaps their fears are not real, but their response was. It was not a human response, certainly not a G-dly response, it was a response from their animal being.

A few days ago, I encountered this teaching of Imam Al-Ghazali in his discussion of the causes of anger and its cure. One of the cures is as follows:

Another kind of medicine based on knowledge is to think about the
ugly face of the angry man, which is just like that of the ferocious
beast. He who appeases anger looks like a sober and learned man.


Unwittingly, I had done Imam al-Ghazali's exercise and it had worked. In the face of the ferocious beast within another I found, at least for some moments, the humanity in myself. The Baal Shem Tov, the founder of the Chassidic movement, taught that every experience in our lives has the potential of giving us instruction in our service of G-d. Here it seems very clear. When we are surrounded with hostility we just need to look at the faces around us. We can look into the face that is staring us down and see that inner animal, see the tangible evidence that for that moment, our “enemy” has lost the struggle within and let that experience heal us, to allow the humanity within us to be victorious.

Note on the picture:
To find out more about that picture above from Little Rock, Arkansa in 1957 check out this article. Its quite a story.

http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/features/2007/09/littlerock200709?printable=true¤tPage=all

The World is full of Strife

I have been pretty quiet for these last few weeks as the world has been caught up and continues to be caught up in strife and conflict. The events of these days show us that strife can be as creative as it can be destructive. The struggle both within and without can produce both tremendous good and tremendous evil. This is true not only of strife on a grand scale but for strife at every level. Indeed, as this piece from Rebbe Nachman of Breslov illustrates, all strife bears a common nature, from the conflict of nations to the struggles of the individual with their own multiple selves. I have come back again and again to this piece from Rebbe Nachman of Breslov on the nature of strife and on the nature of struggle. I offer it as a kind of poetic meditation. Please let me know what you think. (As always I love to see parallel texts from the Muslim tradition as well.)



The World is Full of Strife

The entire world is full of strife, between nations of the world, between one city and another. And so in every house, and with the neighbors, between husband and wife and between parents and children.
And yet, no one turns their heart to the ultimate end of life, that people die every day and the day that has past will never be again, that every day brings us closer to death.

Know that each and every form of strife, even that between husband and wife is in reality the same as the struggle between nations. Each member of the family is their own country, and their quarrels are their wars. The qualities of each nation are also reflected in these individuals. Some nations are known for anger, others for blood-thirstiness. Each one has its particular quality. These same traits are found in each household.

Even if you don’t want to fight and you want to live in peace and calm, you are forced into struggle. So it is with nations. A nation may desire peace and make many concessions to achieve it. But no matter how much it tries to remain neutral, it can still be caught up in war. Two opposing sides can demand its allegiance until it is drawn into war against its will.

The same is true in a household. Man is a miniature world. His essence contains the world and everything in it. A man and his family contain the nations of the world, and all their battles.

Thus a man living alone can sometimes go crazy. Right there within him are all the warring nations. His personality is that of the victorious nation. Each time a different nation is victorious, he must change completely and this can drive him insane. He is alone and can’t express the war within him. But when one lives with others, these battles are expressed toward his family and friends…

When the Messiah comes all wars will be abolished. The world will have eternal peace, as it is written, "They will neither hurt nor destroy…" (Isaiah 11:9).

- Sichot HaRan

An Open Letter to My Friends at Hillel

[IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: The following open letter is not meant in any way as a critique of the Hillel organization or its students. The issues raised are certainly not unique to the students of Hillel, they are part of what goes on in our community generally. As the title and closing suggest, it is a note to friends from a friend. I shared it because I trust that we (Jew, Muslim, Christian or Atheist)are a community who is ultimately concerned about values. In the Jewish community, there has been a lot of public criticism lately and making federal cases rather than opening discussion. This isn't that. This is asking for a change of heart not a change of policy. If you have any comments or questions please direct them to me.]

Shalom Aleichem,

I really enjoyed seeing you all the other night, sharing my one Chassidic joke (the "Mental Floss" picture should remind you) and a Rebbe Nachman story. I love being around college kids. Its energizing and alive and I like that. It was hard though hearing some of your “comedy.” I am not exactly sure why prefixing any concept with the “f” word is supposed to make it more funny. But, ok, maybe that’s just generational. What got me was the denigrating humor. You pretty much hit everyone, blacks, gays, the “f*****g” Latina maid, even the Asians. Then there was the joke about the Jewish guy who refuses to commit to Judaism because he just wants to ***** Muslim girls. Did the joker happen to notice who was sitting next to me? Did you see the young lady in the hijab who dipped her toe into your world only to have it scalded? What do you think she might of thought at that moment? How do you think she might have felt? I suspect she struggled with herself to be generous. I, however, was mortified and ashamed for us.
Now, you know I am close with lots of folks at the MSU. I imagined myself at one of their gatherings, and honestly, I can’t imagine anyone saying anything like that. Publicly denigrating others just would not be acceptable. And if someone had said something that was offensive, I would feel perfectly comfortable walking up to him afterwards and saying, “Ok, that is totally against your values and mine. Its not right and its not ok.” I am confident that I would be heard with respect. It saddens me that didn’t feel that I could do that with you. I don’t feel like we share a common set of values. I don’t feel like I can count on the deeply Jewish sense of respect that I wish you had. I don’t feel like I can appeal to your desire for Jews or Judaism or Hillel to stand for something of ethical or spiritual value because I am not sure that in your eyes it is meant to stand for anything at all. The Tribal gathering is enough. Our institutions are simply grateful that you call yourself Jews and that you choose to socialize with other Jews. We, the elders of the Tribe, are afraid to ask you for more. I was afraid even to tell you, as fundamental as it is to who we are, that denigration of others is not what our tribe is about. I didn’t think you would get it. I thought you would push me away.
I hope you won’t see in this letter an old bearded dude waving his finger at you. I don’t mean to do that. Please see it as my expression of confidence in you in your ability to connect to a Jewishness rooted not just in genetics but in values.
King Solomon in the book of Mishlei (Proverbs 9:8) taught,

Correct a wise person, and they will love you.

This letter is meant to express my trust both in your wisdom and in your respect. I look forward to our continuing friendship.
Shabbat dinner at the Weissman household is really pretty special. I hope you will join us sometime soon. Just email me for a date at bresloverlee@gmail.com or find me on facebook.

Kol tuv (All the best!)
Lee Weissman

The Elephant in The Room: A Fresh Approach

Clearly in any discussion between Jews and Muslims, Israel /Palestine, “Zionism” vs. “Anti-Zionism” is the veritable elephant in the room. I have been contemplating how to approach that subject in a way that is going to be helpful, interesting and promote discussion rather than push everyone to their respective corners. Let me continue with that analogy for a second, the analogy of a room. Most rooms have 4 corners, so you are stuck with 4 possible positions to which to retreat. Imagine however an ever expanding geodesic dome (if you don’t know what that is, you should look it up) in which there are lots and lots of corners, representing a wide variety of potential opinions. If I can create that “space” (I am such a hippy huh?) then maybe we can avoid the solution-stifling rhetoric of “stand with us!” and “whose side are you on anyway?”

So here is the simple plan. Let me know what you think of “Zionism” (Whether you generally identify yourself as a "Zionist" or an "Anti-Zionist” or a "Non-Zionist" (even if you have some discomfort with those labels)in a paragraph in which you do three things.

1) Give your tightest most clear definition of what you mean by the term “Zionism”
2) Explain in personal terms, as if talking to a friend who actually cares what you think and feel, why you think or feel the way you do. How and why do you choose to identify yourself.
3) Give me a short demographic description of yourself - whatever you think folks need to know.
So I might say about myself, “50 years old married Jewish teacher, Interested in Breslov chassidus, living in the United States with grand children in Israel.”


I will then post your responses. Postings will be anonymous and will include only the demographics you provide.

Please invite others to send them to me as well. The more I have the better.

I think it will be a great exercise and a chance to see what real people really think.

Please post directly into the comments or send your comments to me at jihadijew@gmail.com to repost for you.

To Destroy a Life is to Destroy a World

My continuing meditation on these verses which I presented last week…

For this reason was Adam created alone, to teach us that whosoever destroys a single soul, the Torah regards as guilty as though he had destroyed an entire world; and whosoever preserves a single soul the Torah ascribes merit to him as though he had preserved an entire world.
-Talmud Bavli, Sanhedrin 37a

Because of that We ordained for the Children of Israel that if anyone killed a person not in retaliation of murder, or (and) to spread mischief in the land - it would be as if he killed all mankind, and if anyone saved a life, it would be as if he saved the life of all mankind. And indeed, there came to them Our Messengers with clear proofs, evidences, and signs, even then after that many of them continued to exceed the limits (e.g. by doing oppression unjustly and exceeding beyond the limits set by Allah by committing the major sins) in the land!.
-Qur’an 5:32 (The Noble Qur'an)

In Jewish thought, we distinguish between two kinds of religious knowledge, aggadata, stories and narratives which convey a moral or spiritual message, and Halacha, law. The verse above is clearly aggadata, a broad moral directive. Its lesson is clear. It teaches us that all killing is the spiritual equivalent of genocide.
Halacha (Law) is much more practical. The Torah’s justice sometimes demands a death sentence (albeit very rarely meted out). That is legal killing. War can also be legal killing. The law is that after a call to peace (which often simply means surrender) a defensive war is sometimes justified. Once justified, there is a recognition in the Halacha that it is a condition of war that both combatants and non-combatants will be killed.
There would seem then to be a kind of disconnect between the aggadata and the Halacha, between the moral ideal of Torah and the its embodiment in law.
It seems to me that the same situation exists in Sharia. The general principal is that all killing is the moral equivalent of genocide. The verse in the Qur’an even references the Jewish teaching. And again, justice sometimes demands a death sentence. And again, war is sometimes justified after an offer of peace. Sharia then limits attacks on non-combatants but again recognizes that sometimes civilian casualties are inevitable.
(This is a quick summary of the Halacha and Sharia. I would be happy to do a more in depth comparative study of the texts that relate to this, if anyone is interested. Please correct me in detail if I am mistaken.)

There would seem to be the same disconnect between the Sharia which allows forms of legal killing and the spiritual direction that all killing is equivalent to genocide.

One way to bridge the gap perhaps is offered by the medieval Jewish scholar, Rabbi Moshe ben Nachman (the Ramban) writing in 13th century Spain on the verse..

G-d spoke to Moses, saying:
Speak to the entire congregation [of] Bnei Yisroel and say to them: You shall be holy, for I, Hashem your G-d, am holy. (holy=qodesh = quds)
-Vayikra (Leviticus) 19:1-2

Ramban comments..

“You shall be holy” Just as I keep away from worldy pleasure so you should keep away from wordly pleasure. According to my opinion this is not just referring to keeping away from inappropriate sexuality as suggested by Rashi. That kind of separation is mentioned many times in scripture with the word “separation”. The fact is that the Torah warns us about forbidden relationships and foods but permits us to have relations with our wives and to eat meat and wine. So we find that a person of a lusty nature has room to engage in licentious behavior with his wife and to guzzle wine and be a glutton with meat. He can do as he pleases in all the areas of foolishness which the Torah otherwise forbids. Observe, that one can be a boor within the bounds of Torah (or with the permission of the Torah) Naval b’ reshut ha Torah..

In other words, a legal system, even a Divine one, in order to be livable by real people in real societies needs to take into account the basic sometimes base drives of human beings . It must be able to accommodate special cases and circumstances. We believe that G-d knows his creatures. It will have loopholes and allowances they may allow people to act pretty badly and still be “within the letter of the law.”


To kill one human being is to destroy a world. It seems to me that these verses are reminders to us that compelling and disturbing spiritual reality to inspire believers to restrict ourselves from the allowances of the law, to be strict with ourselves in our respect for human life. In a generation where so many demonstrate their piety by strictness in ritual observance, this is a call to express our piety in the observance of morality, to choose to refrain from violence against one another.
It also calls us to think very differently about when we do choose to use violence. For example, in western Just War theory, there is as the “doctrine of proportionality.” Here is a scholarly description.

According to the doctrine, a state is legally allowed to unilaterally defend itself and right a wrong provided the response is proportional to the injury suffered. The response must also be immediate and necessary, refrain from targeting civilians, and require only enough force to reinstate the status quo ante. That said, experts say the proportionality principle is open to interpretation and depends on the context. "It's always a subjective test," says Michael Newton, associate clinical professor of law at Vanderbilt University Law School. "But if someone punches you in the nose, you don't burn their house down."

http://www.cfr.org/publication/11115/israel_and_the_doctrine_of_proportionality.html

This is a profoundly civilized concept and it makes perfect sense that when it comes to killing more is worse, that a violent response even in self-defense should not be excessive. This is a big part of how we talk about the use and abuse of violence. It is a big part of how we justify violence and for why we decry violence. We weigh the numbers. These verses come to challenge our thinking. They tell us that, in relation to the act of killing, the core of the concept of proportionality is ultimately spiritually obscene. There are no formulas for the weighing of human life. You cannot put infinity on two sides of an equation in any meaningful way. The deeper reality is that human life is infinitely precious. Anyone who has lost anyone they love knows this and yet its so easy to overlook and so easy to forget.

Baruch Hashem, Alhamdulilah - G-d sends us reminders.

Ribbono shel Olam / Rab ul Alameen, help us to be mindful always of the absolute value of each and every one of us. In the acknowledgement of that reality, please help us set the highest standards for ourselves and to encourage others around us to sanctify ourselves even in what is permitted to us for the preservation of every human life, for the preservation of Your world.

The Man on the Bike Goes Into Advertising

From the moment that our common father Avraham / Ibrahim opened his four-sided tent to the world (so says an ancient Jewish source) and demonstrated the power of the One True G-d and practice of kindness, we have been taught to be extraordinarily careful about the welfare of others, both others of our own people (and hopefully its clear by now) those who are not "US." Knowing what others need and providing it is all about the details. Its not about sound bites, its about those who know a situation well, those who have a stake finding out what folks need and providing it. The recipe is simple in concept and extraordinarily difficult in execution.
I read the following article yesterday.

http://www.jewishjournal.com/community/article/the_billboard_debate_on_the_middle_east_20110111/


I thought to myself, "So this is what happens when the man on the bike meets Madison Ave." Organizations are competing for our support with slogans and images, some more benign than others, but all meant to convince us without teaching us, to persuade us rather than help us to really understand. Some of them are meant to make us afraid of one another, to make us keep our distance, to close our ears and close our hearts. Even worse, they expect the fate of millions of Palestinians and Israelis to depend on what we come to believe from their advertising. The battle cry for the Jihad of communication is "We can do better!"

My suggestion, close your eyes to the billboards (but keep your eye on the road) and open the flaps to your tent!

An Open Letter to the Anonymous Man on the Bike

To the anonymous bike rider,
Greetings of Peace!

You may remember us from Saturday morning. I was the Jewish guy in the round hat and the long coat. I was walking with my daughter, the one with the curly reddish hair. We were just over the bridge headed toward the lake when we met you, well kind of met you. Its our Sabbath and we were on the way to synagogue. We don’t drive so it gives us time to talk and solve all the world’s problems. A whole bunch of bicycles passed us in a big group. I think you were just about the last in the pack. As you turned the corner and rode past us you shouted “Free Palestine!” (I found out later that you have done that before to other religious Jews on other Saturday mornings in the same neighborhood.) I joked to my daughter, that to give you the benefit of the doubt, maybe you believe that either my daughter or I are superheros (my daughter could be, I for sure am not) and you figured that we could free Palestine with our superpowers right then and there. Ok, sadly its not so simple but at least your heart would be in the right place. But, as generous as it is, its an unlikely hypothesis.

Lets face it, what you really wanted was to piss me off. Granted, maybe it’s a fair bet. A lot of Jews probably would be upset at the message itself. (Though, you might want to get a field guide to Jews because guys with round black hats and long shiny coats don’t tend to be real political and are often not Zionists at all.) So you were pretty sure this was going to make the Jewish guy angry. Well, you were right but for the wrong reason. Having never met me or spoken to me in our lives, you simply assume that I am a rabid nationalist (I am not) or that I do not want peace and freedom for Palestinians (I do.) Instead of seeing my daughter and I walking and enjoying each others company on their way to pray to G-d, you see a cardboard cutout of your favorite villain at which you can feel free to toss your bumper sticker message like a verbal grenade and run away on your bike. Yeah, I am angry at you, not because you support the cause of Palestine but because in the way you communicate to me you demonstrate that you don’t see ME at all. You don’t see my daughter at all. You are interested in scoring points and not in communication. That makes you part of the problem instead of part of the solution. How much longer do you think we can afford the luxury of talking past one another? How much longer do want to keep dehumanizing each other? Next time, do us both a favor and get off your bike and talk to me. It’s the courageous thing to do. Had you talked to me you might have seen that I am not your enemy, you might have seen that my daughter is one the kindest people you will ever meet and you might have had a forum on this blog to communicate your thoughts with all sorts of people, people who might actually be able to hear you.

The Baal Shem Tov taught that everything one experiences in life has a positive lesson for the service of G-d. I did learn something from you. You were working pretty hard on riding that bike, and yet as busy as your body was peddling, the cause was on your mind and the very moment you saw me the words leaped from your lips.

Ribbono Shel Olam (Rab ul Alameen), no matter how hard I work in this world, no matter how hard I spin my wheels, let my thoughts never stray far from You and may Your great Name always be on my lips. May Your praise leap from my mouth the moment I see the beauty of Your creation. Give peace and purity of heart to my new teacher, the anonymous man on the bike.

Kol tuv (all the best)
I hope we talk soon
-Lee Weissman